I wish I could tell you that there is a magic pill, a specific recipe that will get you all the self confidence in the world in an instant. What I can tell you are specific elements that can contribute to your personal self confidence when learning something new by understanding learning curves, would that be of value?
To begin with, let me first share a brief history of where I started in order for you to get a grasp on why I can speak to you on this. I used to be a painfully shy girl that hardly spoke. I was awkward, gangly, had a uni-brow a mullet and wore coke bottle glasses (even though I didn’t need them). In my mind self confidence was something others had, not me. The interesting thing though is that we all have all of our answers hidden inside, like a secret puzzle, and to open the treasure chest one has to be brave and go out on the adventure to seek the gold, which in my case was gaining confidence and knowing who I was. With any new skill you simply have to go out and seek it. Ever hear the saying, “what you seek is seeking you?” Taking action is the most successful and important step in everything you do. Dreams without action are just dreams, dreams with action are reality.
What you want in life is not going to come knocking on your door. You have to go out and get it.
Early on in life I knew I had to get comfortable being on stage. I had a feeling in my gut that it would be part of my future life and I forced myself to do things that were uncomfortable like speak in front of the class, eventually leading to singing, fashion shows, improvising, acting, dancing, presenting and beyond. If I had mindset tools back then I definitely would have excelled quicker, still I honor my journey as it made me who I am. My journey actually fuels why I am passionate about what I do, especially when you can maximize the quality of life in a shorter amount of time by using scientifically proven techniques that are result based.
Now, I want you to go ahead and think back to when you learned something, like when you had to walk? Read? Ride a bike? Learn to drive? At first everything is all over the place and it’s difficult, maybe even a little scary, then as you move forward and repeat the steps it becomes unconscious and voila it’s turned into a skill and/or habit. With competence comes confidence. As with anything new it’s a skill that has to be learned. Would you want a pilot who only read one book on flying, with no hands on training, to be in charge of your safety during a flight? Probably not! I wouldn’t! She had to develop the skill, through action, repetition, competence and confidence.
I will share that when I took first took flying lessons years ago I was overwhelmed, terrified, then after I got the hang of it and felt more competent my confidence grew. I am human too, like you, and there are times I wanted to give up on things and truly it is at that point I encourage you to stick around. You are much more capable then you could imagine!
While there is no magic download you do possess the magic internally. My simple suggestion is to give what you are learning time, patience and stick with it. We are hard wired to learn in this fashion. While it’s true we are all individuals and learn at different rates and ways, the equation is still the same:
Action + Repetition + Competence = Confidence. In our trainings we delve deeper into this and for right now I just wanted to stay big picture to keep it simple. For added entertainment, throw in a dose of curiosity: makes things more interesting. Additionally having a sense of humor is power!
Now relax! You are doing great!
“When you have confidence, you can have a lot of fun. And when you have fun, you can do amazing things” (unknown)